A brother in Christ, who is attempting to start a support group for pornography and sexual addiction asked me to "weigh in" with my opinion. Having dealt with and overcome (not by my doing but by the grace and strength that comes from God) a tenacious addiction to pornography, I feel qualified to speak on the issus; again, not by anything I have done, but by what Christ has done and continues to do in my life, from the inside out.
Below is my response to my friend's inquiry "What would you say needs to be the primary focus in overcoming pornography and sexual addiction?"
Lust, sexual immorality, sin against one's own flesh, idolatry, Satan and demonic forces, what it means and looks life to truly know and follow Christ and experience the power of His resurrection and the victory that comes with that power. I can speak from my own experience of being bound by pornography and the sexual sin and idolatry that came with that sin habit. Pornography is a vice or tool of the enemy, used by the enemy to captivate my heart and mind to the point that I become bound up, like a man in chains, unable to move forward through life the way God desires for me.
If we are to tackle and overcome any addiction, we must start at the core; at the very root of the problem. Pornography is no the root, it is the tool that Satan uses to draw out our fleshly nature. Through intensified feelings and emotions we become attached to that high and detached from the will of God for our lives. When our own flesh takes over, and we are ruled by our feelings and emotions, it is our hearts, which the Bible says is desperately wicked, that leads the way and runs our lives. When we give our lives completely to God, fully surrendered as living sacrifices (Rom.12:1-2); heart, mind, soul and strength, only then can we come to know and fully experience His plan and purpose for our lives. He then begins to transform us by the renewing of our minds, conforming us to His image, instead of the image of this world.
In my honest opinion, the whole recovery movement is bent on keeping our minds focused on the problem instead of on the solution. As long as I kept believing "I am in recovery" the more I believed I could have a "relapse." Thereby treating my "addiction" like cancer, that can come and go. As a born again child of God, I am not in remission from sin, I have been set free from sin, meaning that whatever used to bind me up, I have been loosed from. It really comes down to the state of one's mind. That is where the battle of good and evil takes place. That is the valley of decision. Do I choose God's way which always leads to victory, or do I choose the world's way or my own way, which are really one in the same. The world is filled with people who are bent on living life their own way, on their own terms. The world is self-centered. This is why Jesus said His kingdom is not of this world and neither are those who follow Him. The kingdom of God is made up of citizens who have abandoned their own will for what God wills. It is not a self-centered kingdom, but a Christ-centered kingdom. When I commit my life and will to following Christ, I am no longer the king of my own realm. I have surrendered the throne of my heart to the King of kings. I am no longer my own. I can speak from experience, that as long as I focused on my "sexual addiction" and recovering, I was focusing on my flesh, my emotions and feelings, my..., my...., etc. But when I fully surrendered my life to Christ and abandoned my own will, desires, ambitions, etc. Christ came in like a flood, and His Spirit took over.
I like to compare this to giving ownership of my earthly house (my physical body) back over to the One who designed and built it. I am not the owner, I am merely the occupant. When I did this, a new Landlord (Christ) took over. Since then, the Landlord has sent his Agent (Holy Spirit) to give eviction notices to all uninvited and unwelcome guests who desire to take up space within my head. Whenever a thought or an idea desires to take up residence within me, my response is to take it up with the Landlord. If He approves, then the thought or idea can stay and I can further explore them. If the Landlord does not approve, then they have to go. The Bible is my Landlord Statement. In this statement, the Landlord tells me what is good and acceptable.
